I am really sorry about the pages not being what they were supposed to. Marty changed the site names and didn't tell me he did that (nor did he know to) so I guess you will just have to visit their site to get the info on those pics.

My pics are not so fabulous. I was kinda busy and all with this con as it was the one my pals from Con-Tour were throwing and making it success was more important than catching some fan throwing up in a pool on film, so I do apologize on that one.  On the up side, there are hundreds of pics out there that I will give out links to as I find them, so don't despair.

What pics I do have I will show you on a different site once I get them scanned.  I just wanted to get the review out fast and I was running out of time, so don't feel like I cheated you on all accounts.  This con was rather weird and I got drunker than usual, so bear with me on these details as some seem to run together (how unusual!).  This review was got out in a hurry so excuse the spelling errors and not doting on events as much as I usually do.  There was so much going on and you know how I ramble.  Hopefully this will entertain you.

So I went to Fantasm this weekend on the 26th, 27th and 28th of February, 1999.  I took a plane to this one (Spartanburg is a 7 hour drive - screw that), as I am sure the plane ticket cost as much as the parts that would fall off my car on the way there anyway.  And this way, I could sleep on the plane :).  My pal Ron from Con-Tour Magazine picked me up Thursday nite from the airport.  He was one of the coodinators of the con (as well as a funny, funny man).  He took me back to the hotel where I was met up with Giggles (Chris) and Marty.  After we chatted a bit about what the site needed and when we were coordinating what (a lot good that did), I had dinner and went upstairs to the fifth floor for the pre party games which included body shots (there is a video of me and chris located here).  Then the rest of the die-hard fans showed up - The Jonestown group, Choei the other cam girl and her pal Tia (though they didn't show up til we were all asleep and they were in desperate need of a room from Ron), the reverend, Amy, Amy's friend Nikki, and of course, everyone's fanged favorite - Greyson Wolf - (sorry about the last review sweetie, didn't mean to leave you out).  I know I left some people out, but you know who you are, and you know you are in the thursday pics.

Friday, Chris had the nerve to make us get up early (I so wanted to sleep in for my vacation) so we could get an early start on setting up our cam booth in the dealer’s room.  While we were having our french toast (yes, this is now a tradition), Cloei walks in from the room two doors down from us complaining on how she couldn’t find anyone from last night.  She had to drive from Tampa (a longer drive than Huntsville) and was dead tired.  She had brought her pal –Tia (she used to go to MOC when it was in Greenville) who was fabulous with makeup and had the most stunning eyebrows you could paint.  At first I thought Tia was pretty bitchy, but it seems that if you were driving for 12 hours straight, you might be a little cranky as well.

At this point, the morning paper had come out and was saying all sorts of nasty things about our convention.  We even made the front page (giggles has the article on her site if you want to read it), which must mean this town doesn’t have any news going on for it at all.  How sad, since even Huntsville has a tiny tolerance for conventions – and I consider that town a certifiable wasteland.  After we had a good laugh reading the paper, we set off downstairs into "town" to find some supplies to decorate our booth with.  We let Tia drive, and after about 15 minutes of the "scenic route" (she was trying to aim for the big buildings that weren’t there), we asked a nice man in the projects that we ended up at where to find the nearest Wal-Mart.  After buying 100 dollars worth of junk at the Family Dollar and window shopping at the Army Surplus Store (Tia is trying to find a gas mask - no I don't know why) we went to the dealer’s room at the hotel and began setting up.  When we were done, we had a fabulous Sailor Moon/candy/3 year old’s birthday party/talk show set looking booth.  We were so proud and I hope the pics come out for you to see this monstrosity that we put up.

After we set up the booth, I went off in search of Ron, who was supposed to tell me what "The Big Game" was since Wes never made it to Spartanburg.  Steve and I entered the "The Big Game" and answered questions based on the dice roll and the life-size game board which I was a game piece and Steve was my partner.  We kicked so much ass and won the game within 20 minutes.  After you complete the game, you and your partner have to sing your best rendition of "Tomorrow".  I can't sing, but neither can Steve so it didn't really matter - we got prizes anyway.

I went to change for my cheesy rendition of "The Gong Show."  I looked like such the drag queen with my big blonde wig. Now, all I needed were acts.  I had to get about five contestants or Ron threatened to gong me continually for an hour on stage for the poor planning on my part.  How was I supposed to know that people wouldn’t sign up to be ridiculed on stage? Anyway, the most important part of the show was the fact that I built the gong (chimes?) myself out of PVC piping for the low low price of $17.89.  I managed to find another few people (thank god Vera did his strip tease), and the show went off without a hitch - except when the Kessler brothers (who are known throughout fandom for their DJing skills) even got in on the act by acting like the two brothers from "A Night at the Roxbury" and ended up throwing me back in forth in the middle of them on stage – much like the girl of off Saturday Night Live(they did this to me periodically throughout the con at the worst of moments).  Tia even did her fabulous Light-Someone-On-Fire trick on one of the Bendovahos – Man with Nice Ass.  Man with Nice Ass even blew fire out of his mouth and almost burnt my wig off my head.  Unfortunately, (but not suprisingly) the act that got the highest score was a person that could down a beer in a few gulps.  Go figure.  Of course, I have no pics of this show as I was in it for the most part and couldn’t find anyone to take pics for me.  But I am still hitting up my friends for what they caught on film.

Then I had to change once again for the Miss Fantasm Pageant.  I was a judge and wanted to look fantastic (of course) for this one as well.  It ended up as Dennis (one of the artist guests who thinks i am a guy in drag), me and the two Jesters as judges, with Jester Fred trying to use the gong as a method of judging as well as numbers like pi.  I even got to kiss one of the contestants who caimed to have Marge Simpson as her fantasy lover. I’m not sure what pills she takes, but I am pretty sure they are way stronger than mine. Amy won the crown for her convincing catholic school girl act.  I am pretty displeased that she didn’t wear the crown for the rest of the convention.  Had I not been judging, I would have entered saying that my fantasy was to be able to sleep in.  Not very sexy, I know, but I’m just here for the laughs, folks.

Later that evening, the dance started and I decided to wear my ivy bikini which got rave reviews (and fell apart on me by losing bits of pieces of plant life throughout the nite).  I have got pics of this.  The urinal picture is my favorite. You'll see.

There were so many parties, but the night is a little bit of a blur. Usually when I get this sort of brain fart, I try to look at the pictures to get my memory back, but.... you know the story - pics later, review now.

The next day, I wore my mansuit and started out my day with breakfast at noon with some of  favorite con goers - Jester Fred, Jester Dale, Jason of Jonestown, and Tia - who had totally gotten shitfaced the night before and was barely making it through this meal.

Tia and I went to go see Chris at the booth and joined in her talk show and her cam.  We had plastic easter eggs filled with questions and topics to talk about while we were on cam and invited strangers to join us and chat a while.  It was a good show and I hope it turned out right on the internet.

Later I ran into Steve (different steve then before - this is PhotoMoe of www.modelcams.com) who set up a photo shoot for me in his room (no, he didn’t have a van, he was very nice).  I hope to have those pics out for you to see in the next couple of weeks.  He is trying to get the money up to develop all 27 rolls of film he took at the convention.  He also took pics of Cloei, Chris, and the harem (we’ll get to that later), and some of me and Chris together (we look so cute in the same dress).  These are gonna turn out great.

The dating game soon happened and I was roped into playing a game i am not sure I wanted to be in.  But after the questions of "Who would you fuck if given the choice.....madonna, betty page or (insert name of muppet here) who would it be and why?" and "How spicy do you think my Cho Cho is?" a winner was picked (a staffer from ExotiCon and a good pal of mine - Pat) and we won an all expense paid trip to Wendy's and a year supply of Rice-a-Roni (the San Fransico Treat - duh!).

The slave auction was next, and Bonnie gave me her party judge badge (I knew how much it meant to her so it was quite a gift) for participating. I gave it to Chris, cuz I love her so dearly and she was eyeing it until I did (just jokes, Chris).  All the women went for a considerable amount of money and yours truly was no exception.  I once again took the prize for being the most money - $300.00 and all I had to do was pose for pics (clothed of course - you know me better than that!) with my master and the other harem girls - Amy (fantasm queen), Chris, Teresa (his girlfriend and pal of mine).  We had a great time and I will show you the pics as soon as PhotoMoe develops them.

Afterwards the drag show started and we had to sit down and see what was going on for that one. Of course, none of the men wanted me, they would rather have Marty, but I guess that's the breaks when you are a gal looking for a straight crossdresser - they don't exist except for maybe three in the universe (and I can't find them!).

Then the event that we had been waiting for took place with myself, Chris and Marty and of course the star of the show - Cloie.  We basically had a live cam show for the folks at the con and it will be broadcast sometime this week (somewhere between 3-1 and 3-5 on gigglecam).  Cloie had her whip out and her clothes off in a matter of fifteen minutes and had the audience going for the remainder of the show.  We took volunteers from the audience (Jester Fred was among them) and even Amy got up there to do her thing.  She has been thinking about getting a cam (and yes, I will let you know as soon as she tells me) and wanted to try it out in front of a live audience.  She did fabulous for her first time and the crowd loved her.  I could go into more detail, but I know there are other reviews out there that will be solely about this event and so I will let them tell it to you.  I know Giggles is gonna have it on her site.

I must have changed outfits 6 times that evening (no joke) and managed to maintain my rep as a girl as some guys had the gall to ask if I was a man (rumor has it i was taking hormones). As much as I like my costumes to be believable, I was floored when accused of it.  I flogged Dennis about this later (he spread this rumor), and he said he actually believed my little joke about me being a man and taking hormones.  How gullible.   Anyway, haven proven myself, I was once again a girl - just one with a nasty attitude should you tell her she is a man.

The AAngry Party is the one party I remember most, as they had a drink with Midori and Everclear and it would knock you on your ass before you knew it.  Of course, no con is complete without The Machine.  The party was in full swing and our master of the slave auction got strapped in and his harem (including me) got to spank the living shit out of him. Great party!

I got to bed around 4:30 that morning and got on my plane hungover but happy.

What did I learn this weekend?

I learned that its easy to get lost in a small town even though there isn't much to it, that everclear and midori are evil, and that turbulence when you are hungover in a plane is god awful.  I also learned that I hate jealous women, and that Christine of the Jonestown party should keep that in check should she want to keep both of her legs.  (that's love I am sharing with you, Christine - not a threat).  I also learned that this is probably my worst review i have ever written.

Anyway, sorry this review sorta sucks without the pics (they will be going up shortly - I hope), but the next one will be better. I am going to MOC on March 19, 20, and 21, 1999 in Athens, GA.  I am hosting the Full MOC Monty and it is what you think it is. See ya there or you'll  read it here.

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