updated 7/19/00

Yeah, I know.. a rip off from Craiggers - but his show is pretty much sucking right now (should have stayed with The Daily Show), so I don't feel nearly as bad as I would normally for stealing his stuff.  I think I could do a better job with it anyway. 

So here it is, my words of wisdom to take you through your day (or couple of days as you will cut me some slack on how often I update this).  You can even ask a specific question to me (via email - not icq) if you want some specific "wisdom" from me. 
Here is some non specific wisdom: 

So I have successfully run my houseguests (identical twin brothers) off after only a month. Oh, you didn't know I had guests? That's cuz they were basically sleeping most of the time, when they should have been awake, making beer pyramids, or they were trying to control their mammoth pet they call Taz who out weighs me by more than 40 pounds. They were a lot of fun, but they have TOO MUCH drama in their lives for me. My friend Wes and I almost want to dedicate a web page to them for all their "fun" times.

They were staying at my place because of some problems they were having at their place and they had a plan when they were going to move out and where they were going.. yada yada yada, and the small good samaritan that lives in my heart (which maybe just a blackened tumor of bad judgment when I look back at all the things I do when it speaks to me) said to let them stay for a bit.

Now they did have their good points, they were always fixing things around my house (and yes, not all of them were things that they had broken themselves), making actual food (man they ate a lot) to go with the condiments and various experiments growing in my fridge, and yard work. They also had a special knack for knowing where my keys and sunglasses were as well as knowing where any fabulous party was.

The dog I could have done without, though. This thing was so large, when it stepped on my foot, it was pure pain, and it wasn't a graceful dog, either. I'm sure the neighbors' kids weren't big fans of him. He would be outside and see one on a bike and bound out after it and attempt to make "friends" with the screaming child. Though, this always amused me as my love for kids is the size of a english pea - the words "lawsuit waiting to happen" always echoed in my head as I would pull Taz away from the sobbing kid (and usually angry parent by the time I got there). The dog is also very loud - even when it's not barking. It's sighing, scratching, whining and breathing would reverb around the room like a small thunder. It was always making some sort of noise. It also had a tendency to hang out in my room when we would all leave, and it liked to shit there if we didn't get back in time to let it out. It was a sweet dog, but it's too ungainly and boistrous to be in my home.

But now, that's all changed, they have left and even though I know one guy pal that really is hating me right now for letting one of them move in with him (he already has a girlfriend and her friend staying in his one bedroom apartment as well as four missed work days from the party element that revolves around all of that), it's the best thing for me to have my sanity.

The other one I was almost worried his girlfriend (who had been away on, uh, some sort of leave that I would rather not talk about - saving it for another Moment for Us), who broke up with him 5 minutes after she got back in town, wouldn't take him in. But the next day (after the first successful move of twin #1), they made up and after staying with her over night (and leaving me with the big dog with no food - talk about frightening), came over and took the dog and everything is hunky dory all around (at least where I am standing it is - and that's what counts at this moment).

Would I do it again? ok... but the dog would have been SOL this time around.

btw: This link is sorta lame - but a pal of mine always calls them Ace and Gary when he can't remember their names - and the show makes me laugh
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